Dr Kathryn Mannix comes to Weston-super-Mare & Bristol

An ‘agenda’ might seem more suited to a business meeting than a tender conversation with a friend or relative at the end of their life. However, as Kathryn explains in this clip, these important moments often ‘go wrong when one person’s idea of what the conversation should be isn’t the same as the other person’s’. If we can each share what we would like to discuss, we can be much more in tune with each other’s needs and wishes, leading to more compassionate and connected conversations where each person listens and feels heard. Drawing on her personal and professional experience, Julia adds that it is also necessary to consider who we are speaking to, and remember differences in perspective and ways of coping when we are planning what kinds of conversations are possible and appropriate.

Kathryn and Julia’s discussion speaks to the variety of factors and considerations that shape our ability to meet and connect with another person where they are. As a retired palliative care doctor, Kathryn has decades of experience in talking to families about what really matters to them. She is a passionate advocate of opening up conversation about the end of life, with her first book, With the End in Mind (2017), telling the stories of thirty people’s deaths. As she explains, ‘the process of dying is made less frightening and more peaceful, the better prepared we are’ and the more we can speak honestly and compassionately to each other.

Kathryn’s second book, Listen: How to Find the Words for Tender Conversations (2021), builds on these ideas, exploring how moving away from the need to ‘fix’ can make the space we need to really listen. Talking to another person, she writes, is ‘a bit like salsa dancing’; it ‘usually need[s] at least two people, for participants to join in and to take turns’ ‘and in the same way that a dance progresses using steps forwards and backwards, sharing and preserving the space, a conversation includes words and silences, speaking and listening, statements and questions’.

Kathryn will be interviewed by our Founding Director Lucy Selman in Weston-super-Mare on 8 May, and then by Andrew Blades at the University of Bristol on 9 May.

For more information and to book tickets to the Weston event, please visit: www.goodgrieffest.com/events/talking-about-the-big-questions-a-conversation-with-dr-kathryn-mannix

For more information and to book tickets to the Bristol event, please visit: www.goodgrieffest.com/events/dying-for-beginners-an-interview-with-kathryn-mannix

You can read more about Dying Matters Awareness Week here: www.hospiceuk.org/our-campaigns/dying-matters/dying-matters-awareness-week